Part 3: Life in black and white

by Bukamuso Sebata

Photo by author.

The angels sang and danced to the sound of my heart breaking as I fell to my knees. Your betrayal was too much to bear that they all wept for me when I could not find my voice.

Corridor outside the Department of Education at USKAR. Photo by author.

The sound of your voice as you broke me still haunts my dreams. It echoes in the darkest parts of my mind, calling out to the only sane part of me left. I frantically turn this way and that way to find you without losing the only thing keeping me on my feet, but you are gone before I can locate you.

Photo by author.

When I look in the mirror, I see a ghost of what once was. I see someone robbed of her laughter and smile because you were selfish enough to leave me here. The warm embraces of my friends are phantom touches that cannot drag me out of this hole of the dead you left me in.

Photo by author.

If these walls could talk, they would tell you of the tearful nights I spend praying and begging God to bring you back to me. They would tell you of how much I hate myself for wanting you to come back to make it stop hurting.

The botanical gardens. Photo by author.

My brain knows what will happen if I let the pain in. I know it will break me to pieces and I will never be able to put myself back together. So here I sit, in this place I do not recognise to shield myself from your betrayal. I float through space as I try to escape what you did but it still echoes.

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